Square Pegs & Round Holes

An old idiomatic expression from the 1800's declares, "You can't put a square peg in a round hole." While the genius behind that saying remains anonymous the implication is obvious: "Some times there are those among us who just don't fit."

Question: Is that a bad thing?
Answer: No. It's a good thing.

 

History is replete with individuals who struggled to fit into some expectant norm only to find themselves on the cutting edge of revolutionary innovation. Bill Gates with Microsoft, Steve Jobs with Apple, Mark Zukerberg with Facebook, and Jeff Bezos with Amazon, represent such forward thinking world changers.

While it's true the aforementioned belong to a rather elite fellowship of square pegs who leveraged great success into tremendous wealth, a brief survey reveals three of the four dropped out of college without earning a degree. (Gates, Jobs and Zukerberg)

With our recent celebration of Christmas I'm taken back to first century Palestine where from a humble village and quaint carpenter's shop there emerged a square peg named Jesus of Nazareth. By all accounts He was a reject. John tells us, " He was in the world and the world was made by Him, but the world knew Him not. He came unto His own and His own received Him not..."

He was a reject who did not fit the status quo, yet when they crucified him they printed his name in three languages. He remains the single most controversial person in the history of mankind, who in the words of Phillip Yancey, "...so graced the instrument upon which He died it has become the most recognized religious symbol in the world today."

If at times you've felt like a square peg drifting in a sea of round holes wondering if perhaps you will ever fit in... do yourself a favor. Don't look down. Look up! You're in good company!

 

         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

I wrote and posted this to Facebook just after Christmas and since that time have given the proposition considerable thought and come to a conclusion that never in my life have I felt more like a square peg.

 

The frustrating question is..."So, what's a guy to do?"

 

My wife calls it a mid-life crises, but I'm convinced there's more to it. I'm 51 years old and realize some men struggle with significance and call everything into question around this time and station in life. However, the water I'm treading seams to run a little deeper. 

 

When I was 30 years old my wife and I uprooted our three children and relocated 5000 miles to Alaska where we spent 15 years pastoring a church and experiencing another part of the world. While that move came at great cost and with much sacrifice... we have no regrets. It was Awesome!

 

That move was somewhat birthed out of discontent. We knew there was a calling on our life and ministry to do something different and at the time did not realize we were just a couple of square pegs.

 

This time around... there's no longing of the heart to invade another part of the world. North Carolina is home and we are happy to have returned. However, something is pulling at the heart strings and the mystery of it is wearing on me.

 

If anything I'm saying resonates with any of you readers I'll sign off with....

 

Happy to meet you. One square peg to another.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Extended Hiatus

To those of you who follow this blog I'm sure it seems as if I've fallen off the face of the earth. The reason for the extended hiatus is I'm in the middle of remolding and relocating. Our family is moving to another house that needs a make over and I'm standing at the cross roads of overwhelmed and panic. Well, not actually in panic mode yet, but seriously pushing the envelope.

My writing thing has taken a hit over the last several weeks and the itch is killing me. I am helplessly addicted to literature and writing and am convinced of two things. First, one day I will grow up. And secondly, when the day finally comes and I've stepped over the threshold of wannabe, I will have broken into and onto the cherished prize of Amazon's top 100 best sellers.

Until then... Pass me the hammer, a paint brush and order me a cheese burger!

The Cover of Darkness

While I'm in the process of doing the rewrites for my Amazon titles I thought I'd post an excerpt from a spiritual thriller that's been germinating for awhile. It's my first attempt in the genre... love to hear your opinion.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

The Cover of Darkness 

It crept into our land under the cover of darkness and opened a portal to another world. Evil was unleashed; the evidence was everywhere.  First, a terrible sickness attacked the young and elderly. Doctors were unable to diagnose the disease, so they called it a plague and treated the symptoms.
     The night Amy Tucker died a few friends sat with her with her parents during her passing and noticed, that like the others, internal bleeding left her young body swollen and bruised. In the end blood began seeping through the very pores of her skin. It heartbreaking to watch-one called it a bloody mess.
     Then weather patterns changed. Winter came early and lingered with heavy snows and bitter cold. Summer offered no relief. Days were hot, but the sun was often hidden by dark gray clouds which offered no rain. Crops failed, the earth appeared scorched and water became a precious commodity.
     In Harborton things were worse as the trials had started and a few people were being charged with witchcraft. Those found guilty were sentenced to death in the name of God. The fortunate ones went to the gallows; others were burned at the stake. In such times people are looking for  someone to blame.
     I once believed spiritual matters were a product of superstition. I thought church was a crutch for the weak and pious people of this world, but when I saw the goodness of a few saints I was forced to look at the world through a different lens.
     These were people who truly lived for a higher purpose and surrendered themselves to the providence of The Most High. They poured their lives into others and walked out the paradoxes of The New Testament.
     In the process of learning their ways my stony heart began to soften and I learned the difference between the folly of religion and the beauty faith.  The one has more to do with man and the other is all about God.
    I also looked upon a dark presence; a demon called up from the very pit of hell, and learned that as goodness flows from the heart of God, evil pours forth from the darkest off all fallen angels.
     Before the rebellion he was called Son of the Morning, but now he’s called The Dragon, The Serpent, The Deceiver of the Brethren, Beelzebub, and Satan. His purpose is to sow destruction and he’s mastered the art. His greatest allies are unbelief and dead religion.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is a work in progress I plan to have published by early fall.

Good is never easy.

If you’ve been following this blog you're aware of my recent hiatus. It started when I decided to pull all seven of my titles from Amazon due to their lack of performance and weak sell’s. The idea was to take responsibility rather than offering up whiny excuses and make necessary changes that would hopefully give my work a better and  much more professional appearance.

During the process last week I dropped the netbook I’ve been using for the last year and a half and was forced to make an adjustment. I had insurance on the netbook so I filed a claim and was told I would be receiving a replacement within twenty-four hours. Much to my delight FedEx showed up the following afternoon with a package.

 Upon opening the box I discovered they had accidentally sent me a Tablet rather than a Netbook. I was ready to send it back, but my daughter talked me into giving the new device a chance before returning it.

My initiation was a challenge because I’m fifty-one years old and like others of my generation, I too struggle with change.  The tiny touch screen keypad proved to be an obvious problem, however my daughter stepped up and once again opened my eyes as she pulled up all the available  accessories on her on computer and walked me through a few options. I then  borrowed a wireless keypad form a friend which proved it to be very user friendly.

I’ve since learned of a docking system which allows this Tablet to double as a laptop giving me much more versatility and a host of other options, and with that I've become very comfortable with this new gadget. 

So, there you have it. While on this hiatus I've been tweaking my material and during  the process I’ve come a little more into the 21^st century ...as far as technology goes. I have often said,” Good is never easy, but hard is always difficult.”  Often, the two are only separated by a very thin margin in something we call ...attitude. 

While on hiatus I've learned my material needed some work and my attitude needed some adjusting. It has not come easy, but again…”Good is never easy.” Just like this old dog learning a new trick on something called a  Tablet. It has truly made this hiatus much easier.

Blessings,

Cam

My Hiatus

Webster defines Hiatus as:

1

a: a break in or as if in a material object : gap <the hiatus between the theory and the practice of the party — J. G. Colton>

b: a gap or passage in an anatomical part or organ

2

a: an interruption in time or continuity : break; especially: a period when something (as a program or activity) is suspended or interrupted <after a 5-year hiatus from writing>

 

I've high lighted 2a  because its a definition that works for me at the moment. It speaks to my current status well.

 

Those of you who've been following this blog know I am on somewhat of a hiatus as far as the writing gig goes. I was not happy with how my titles were selling on Amazon and rather than making excuses I decided to be responsible and take a stab at becoming more professional with hopes of getting it right this time. 

 

And with that I removed my titles and am in the process of doing the rewrites. While this effort is proving to be more than a little painstaking and very draining...I must admit I've found great value in the discipline.

 

The humbling truth is...I can't believe I short stepped the process and expected anyone to buy my material. As stated earlier...I've come full circle in that I'm rewriting The Note and hope to have it to my editor next week.  Once she has polished the mechanics I'll have a new cover artist on board and a new face on the book.

 

Until then, check out a post I've recently stumbled across from Hugh Howey's Blog. He referenced an article that offers great advice and some "how to's" for those of you who are new to digital publishing. If you follow the steps outlined you will avoid some of my pitfalls and blunders.

 

Until next week...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Un-Published

Well it's done. I just pulled all seven of my titles from Amazon and fell back to the rank of an unpublished wannabe. It was a painful thing to do, but hopefully after working through the process I'll come out on the other side a little more polished and a lot more professional.

If you have read the previous post then you know I made this decision earlier in the week while away from home with my wife on somewhat of a working vacation.

You may recall I shared the fact that my titles were not preforming as well as I thought they should due largely impart to what I called an ugly trinity, or a bad trifecta going in the wrong direction. I said my craft was amateur, my cover art unprofessional and my discipline lacking.

But, what I failed to share with you was the straw the broke this camel's back and the blow that hurt my feelings.

Someone was brave enough to give me an honest review and said the story had potential, but the editing was poor. I have received a couple of negative reviews over the past couple of years, but understood it comes with the territory.

However, this one was different in that she recognized the value of the story, but struggled with my presentation. Though she did not use these words, she was referring to the poor quality in which the story was written.

So what do you do when someone pops your bubble and reality smacks you in the face? You're only left with with three options. (1) Continue swimming in a sea of mediocrity, which at best will only bring  much of the same.(2) Quit. Or, (3) Swallow hard as you take your medicine and fix the problem.

Someone once described mediocrity as being half way up the mountain and that description resonates deeply with me as I recall the words of my late father, "Anything worth doing is worth doing right."

I put effort into the project but stopped short of taking it to the next level  by failing to hire an editor and a cover artist. I stood before the mountain of what it takes to publish and package a story and stopped short of reaching the summit.

And with that I have only myself to blame. In the end... I owe a huge thanks to the negative review. I was embarrassed, humbled and challenged, but with that came the push to get it right.

My reason for posting this confession is an attempt to become more disciplined by making myself accountable to you...my friends and hopefully readers.

The first story I published was called The Note and I've decided to begin with it. I'm rewriting a portion, and then sending it to my copy editor. Then I need to find a cover artist. Hopefully within the month I'll  have it uploaded to Amazon and see what a difference this confession had made.

www.camdockery.com

A Painful Conclusion

(State Capital Building:Colombia S.C.)

Lisa and I are in Colombia South Carolina for a couple of days and staying at the Hilton two blocks from the State Capital building.

Lisa has come to represent the insurance company where she's employed during Farm Bureau's annual convention  and I've come to break away from the chaos of living and give a little consideration to a my writing and publishing hobby.

Those of you who know me are aware that I have a thing for literature and enjoy writing. This interest was intensified a few years ago when my wife gave me a Kindle for Christmas and has been fueled by a shake up of the entire publishing industry.

The rising tsunami of self-publishing has become yesterday's news as a new generation of authors have found a platform, been given a voice and are now earning a living pursuing their passion.

Amazon continues to lead the pack with their recent purchase of Goodreads and with this move they're making a statement that sounds something like, "Yes, we've come to the table and we're...all in."

Technology and trend are dancing to the rhythm of a new song and opportunity has never been better for wanna be authors. The success of Hugh Howey's Wool along with the deal he was offered by Simon & Schuster allowing him to retain e rights while they carry the print rights signals the Big 6 are reconsidering and readjusting. The playing field has been leveled and with that I've come to a personal and painful conclusion.

The six titles I've published with Amazon are simply not good enough.With the exception of one title, (The Note) my cover art is unprofessional and my craft is armature. If that's not enough, my discipline has been lacking.

Like an ugly trinity, or a bad trifecta going in the wrong direction these three issues have left me treading water in a sea of mediocrity. A wise man once said the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. I've been hitting and missing at this thing for a few years and have decided I'm only left with two options. I have to get out, or get serious.

Since getting out would be like giving up and I'd never forgive myself for quitting I've decided to get serious. This week I'll be removing all six titles from Amazon and re-working them.  I have a copy editor who will polish the mechanics and I'm now looking for a cover artist.

There comes a time in every boy's life when he needs to grow up and this boy has come to Colombia South Carolina and made a decision to take responsibility.  So, with that...I'll be spending the rest of my down time today and tomorrow, taking my material off Amazon to be tweaked, re- written and then re-uploaded.

I'll be blogging about the process and keeping you informed.

www.camdockery.com